WROTE A POEM TO IMPRESS A GIRL
It wasn’t a particularly good poem. The only word I could think of to rhyme with ‘vagina’ was ‘North Carolina.’ Frankly, I’ll be surprised if I get to second base.
Someone in my office just taught the end cubicle in the men’s bathroom a severe lesson. It’s only just happened, I walked in and there’s shattered tiles everywhere, the paper towel dispenser is on fire and the spare toilet rolls are screaming and unrolling themselves out the window trying to escape the horror. It’s at least an 8.9 on the Shit-cter Scale, maybe a 9; it’s pretty bad in there. It...